Kids today...
Posted by Nunya
If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!
Not to mention what your parents, if over 60, think!!!
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious
diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what
with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning .. uphill
BOTH ways . through year 'round blizzards. Carrying their younger
siblings on their backs ... to their one-room schoolhouse, where they
maintained a Straight-A average, despite their full- time,
after-school job at the local textile mill .... where they worked for
35 cents an hour just to help keep their family from starving to
death!
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way
in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about
how hard I had it
and how easy they've got it!
But now that...
I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and
notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared
to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia! And I hate to say it but
you kids today you don't know how good you've got it! I mean, when I
was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know
something, we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves,
in the card catalog!!
There was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter ..
with a Pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and
put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!
There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to
hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you
had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd
usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!
And talk of about hardship? You couldn't just download porn! You had to
steal it from your brother or bribe some homeless dude to buy you a
copy of "Hustler" at the 7-11! Those were your options!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone
and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! And we
didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you
had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss,
your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't
know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like
"Space Invaders" and "Asteroids" and the graphics sucked ass! Your
guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!
And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen
forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder
and harder and fast er and faster until you died! ... Just like LIFE!
When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium
seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some
old broad with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you
were just screwed!
Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15
channels and there was no onscreen menu and no remote control! You had
to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You
were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your
ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no
Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday
Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for
cartoons, you spoiled little bastards!
And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up .. we
had to use the stove or go build a frigging fire . imagine that!
If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid JiffyPop thing and
shake it over the stove forever like an idiot. That's exactly what
I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're
spoiled.
You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980
